- Shauna Schneeman
The most important thing about planning
I am starting a series on planning. I love helping my couples and even friends plan their wedding days. I know it is overwhelming to do and the information you will find can be overwhelming as well! However, I can't even go into a full planning blog without starting with the number one piece of advice I give to every single person that is mid wedding planning panic... relax.
That isn't really helpful to anyone that is freaking out though so let me tell you more to put this into perspective.
Let's start at the beginning.
When you are young you dream of the day you find your person. You dream of what your wedding will be like. Some people wait a long time for this to start happening for them!
However it isn't just a dream anymore. You have found a person you want to spend the rest of your life with. They are confessed their desire for commitment and are ready to marry you! Isn't that the most important thing? You found your person who you are going to spend the rest of your life with!
So, although you are about to dive into the exciting, fun, and stressful process of planning your wedding.. you need to remember just one thing from this entire blog. Your planning and your day might have some unplanned twists and turns. Yet, at the end of the day the goal will be reached. You will have married the love of your life. The next day you will have memories, photos (of course), and a spouse to spend forever with.
Let's not dismiss that your wedding is a big day! It should be everything that your heart desires! This is a big occasion to have all of your friends and family witness your devotion to one another and to celebrate your lives coming together. So, although the goal is to be married you should absolutely have a beautiful, personalized day!
If you are beginning to plan your wedding, mid planning, or helping someone else plan you know that the process is chaotic and overwhelming. So many things can happen that might make one aspect of your day difficult or even not obtainable to what you had wanted.
The two biggest challenges in planning I hear from brides are contradicting, but oh so real! You could have too much help, or not enough help. It is a "the grass is greener on the other side" type situation. Some brides come to me upset that they are alone on their planning, while others are upset about how many hands and opinions are trying to be apart of the process.
Let's start with, there is no help. Many times family and friends feel as though you have everything handled. To get help you may need to ask for help or delegate a task or a few tasks. If this isn't an option for you then looking into scaling back your ideas or simplify what you are trying to accomplish can help you.
If you are a bride that is handling many opinions and ideas from those around you, just remember that everyone is just as excited as you are. It is hard to address this in the moment when you are stressed, but reminding yourself that their only hope is to be helpful and that their excitement for your day is their support may help your mind set. Also, speaking on this with that same language when they are asserting themselves. "Hey Aunt Beth, I know you are excited for the wedding and trying to be helpful, but I am actually handling this aspect of the day already. I love your support of us and I am so excited to celebrate with you"
Sometimes things just don't go to plan. It is easy to get frustrated, annoyed, overwhelmed. You will inevitably go through many different emotions getting ready for your wedding! However the goal never changes and the result of your day never changes.
If you are getting ready to plan, mid-planning, or close to your wedding day just remind yourself when something goes array.. The goal! The morning after your wedding all of these details you are stressing over will no longer seem so important. You will wake up that morning with memories, great photos, and a new husband.
Please enjoy this time as much as possible! It is exciting when you remember what you are working towards.